My Blueberry Eggs

My time in China has come to an end.

糟糕！Shhhhhhhiiiiiiiiittttt…. The past four months have flown by

I went here to learn the language and immerse myself in the completely within the culture, I did that.

I went here to go on an absurd legal drinking filled 4-month bender and to do ridiculously stupid things without ending up in a Chinese prison, check

I came here to explore all of the regions of China and Shanghai I could (with much more exploring to follow in my future), check.

I came to eat as many indigenous and regional foods that I could, never turning down something I have never tasted, check.

I went here to get with a Chinese chick, I even did that.

I also have grown up a little bit. Straight Whiskey has become my drink of choice when going out, my love of jazz has grown exponentially, I’ve found that I am a lot more willing to do things after I have had a double shot espresso, I freaking love Belgian beer, I got good at dancing (I still dance like an idiot at most times, but who really cares), I got to really know two of my best childhood friends from Chicago, Flans and Elliott, and I grew my first beard, Oh and what a gloriously disgusting beard it was.

There are some thing’s I will just never forget about this trip (aside from all the culture mumbo jumbo). Whether it was eating Flans’ blueberry eggs and jamming with Max and Ben on guitar till the sun comes up, the smells (Good Lord the smells. Never have I been to a place with so many air pockets of smells, both great and unbelievably horrible, as the back gate of our campus), A-Baring at the our sweet gazebo ‘play spot’ home of many of wine-filled pass outs, going to a sex toy mall with Elliott and being mature enough not to have a dildo fight until an hour into our visit, hangin out at the Uhyger market and eating mutton, whooping some ass in badminton, dancing the night away to Mike Null and the Soulcasters at the House of Blues and Jazz, going out and eating meat skewers and speaking Chinese at 4 am on a Monday with a group of drunk migrant workers, watching OSU-UW upset at Bubba’s, blackout dancing to a Talking Heads concert DVD, or dressing up as Santa and drinking bloody mary’s with a bunch of Singaporeans. Shanghai, China sure has been good to me.

I know I was hating on Chinese people last week, but for the most part I have had really great experiences. The hospitality shown by my friend’s Chinese roommate Ding last week was a perfect example. He invited me Flans and Henrick to his small apartment on the other side of Shanghai for a dinner cooked by his dad. It was hands down the best meal I have had here in China.

The spread was unreal. On the menu, and entirely cooked out of a closet sized kitchen, was stewed pork belly, pounds of lightly pickled cucumbers (which was so good I got the recipe for em), green beens, ginger chicken and potatoes, roasted duck, potato salad, fish soup, and even the Shanghai famous hairy crab. It made the Thanksgiving dinner we had here look like a bitch. His parents toted on us like we were princes. They ate in a separate room from us, refilled out beer and wine whenever they were anywhere close to empty, scooped the sublime crab roe out of the crabs for us and refused… and I mean refused, to let us help clean up in any way. To top it off we finished the night eating dozens of ridiculously sweet Chinese oranges and listened to some of Ding’s extensive collection of American CDs. It was a fantastic cap to an unreal trip.

Last week it was 6o degrees and I wore shorts to class, then it snowed 2 days ago. This week snow took down the Metrodome and God knows it’ll be cold in NJ. God I miss America. And whodathunkit but the Badgers had the best season in a decade…and I missed it. Who gives a shit though cause I’m headin to the Rose Bowl for New Years!!

We have really just been trying to soak everything in these last few days. Immersing ourselves in this culture has brought nothing but love from all of us in the 4 months we’ve been here, and I think that we all really have realized that. This city will not look the same the next time I’m here ( and I WILL be back) as it is growing and evolving at a ridiculous rate. I think that’s why I have loved it so much; this city of 22 million freaking people is the future of China.

Tonight should be a total shit show over here and will make the 14-hour plane ride tomorrow a lot more interesting. As the past four months have flown by, and kinda like Ace and Gary, so will I as I say Zai Jian to Shanghai. 在见上海。 在见中国。

WEIRD THINGS CHINESE DO

( I Wrote this on Thursday)

I’ve been saving this post for the end of the trip, and was going to title it ‘Interesting Things Chinese People Do’. Due to the fact that I got pick pocketed today by some weasley mo fo, I’m going to take this more as an opportunity to vent on how much Chinese suck. I mean…I was having a great day.

I interviewed the owner of my favorite Texas BBQ place for a Globalization paper and had a big ass beer with him, I had a really fun night last night, and the weather is beautiful outside. I really had no reason to complain.

Getting off the train, I decided to treat myself to a bacon, egg and cheese sandwich that I lot of people really like to eat and I have never had it before (its on a bomb ass roti bread like the ones at Flat Top grill, but its super greasy and cooked in the bacon fat, probably the reason its so great). I was crossing a busy intersection and was jamming out to Sting’s I’ll Be Missing You with one iPod headphone in my ear. As I crossed the busy intersection, I was juggling a book and the hot bacon, egg and cheese in my hands. When I went to throw out the wrapper for the sandwich in the trash, I noticed the headphones weren’t plugged into my iPod anymore. A little Chinese girl came up to me a minute later and told me in Chinese that someone had taken my iPod out of my peacoat pocket. FML. And thanks for stopping him little Asian girl.

So I am taking this opportunity to bash on Chinese people for a little bit. Its how I feel at this certain point.

Now I’m not going to rant on the obvious things. Yes, they have a ridiculous infatuation with Lady Gaga. They chain-smoke like no culture (maybe the French) that I have ever been around. Their dental hygiene is borderline nasty (apparently because the water has no fluoride in it) They play WOW, World of Warcraft, in droves and into the early hours of the morning, its really sad. They are horrible, I mean HORRIBLE drivers, (taking DWO to a whole new level I didn’t know existed). And they really can’t hold any of their liquor…..that felt a little better.

But here are the main things I will touch on.

1. Many of them wear glasses frames with no lenses:

Now, I thought this was just something that wannabe trendy hipsters do so they look even more artsy than they are. Like it wouldn’t surprise me if my friend Drew DeGennaro attempted to wear these frames this summer when he was trying to be all Bohemian and shit while living the trendy life Brooklyn. Here, they take that fashion idea and run with it. All the while looking a little bit douchier.

Now my tutor Alice, who I really love and who has helped me through a myriad of challenging homework assignments, wears these frames. Yet, half the time she wears real glasses to help her vision. Why wear the just frames?? I really can’t answer that.

2. They don’t sweat.

Except for my Issues in Modern Chinese Society teacher, Wei Wei (and I only count him as half Chinese cause he went to school at Loyola in Chicago), I really can’t think of any time when I saw a Chinese person was noticeably sweaty.

And it got HOT when we first got here in September. I mean go through 3-4 shirts a day because it was so hot and sticky (God can only imagine how many shirts Hodge would go through if he was here. He goes through 2 before we go out at night, FWI… Every Night). It’s a humidity that puts the August heat in NYC to shame. It was truly unbearable. And you could never find a sweaty Chinaman. When playing basketball, no one is sweating. When we play badminton, and when I played Elliott’s roommate Eric in badminton too, only the white boys were sweating. It was something that was truly unexplainable.

3. As a result, they like luke cold water/ beer

Now I’m a guy who puts ice cubes in every drink. I need it all ice cold at all times. Drinking beer and water that is sweating is sacrilegious, but it happens all the time here and was super noticeable in the hot heat of September.

4. After using the bathroom they don’t use soap.

There is a reason SARS spread so quickly here. THEY DON’T WASH THEIR HANDS AT ALL AFTER USING THE BATHROOM. People still walk around with facemasks on their faces (maybe because of the SARS or the horrible air quality that, since the expo closed, is slowly killing me), yet they don’t wash their hands after shitting. Which takes me to my next topic…

5. They have horrible bathroom traits.

When they poo they wipe then put the tp in a trash can next to the toilet. Try going to the bathroom in 100 degree weather with 100 % humidity at 4 in the afternoon, all with a full can of hot doodie wipes next to you. It’s horrible.

They consistently miss the urinals. I don’t know exactly how this is possible, but every night, I can count on our communal bathroom to have a ridiculous amount of pee on the floor. I mean, I stepped in it this morning when I wasn’t paying attention. They even put signs in public bathrooms reminding them to take their time and make sure that they are finished before walking away… I haven’t even mentioned the chronic splatter pooer on our floor. The Picasso of Chinese roommates. I’ll save that story for a rainy day though.

6. Juice doesn’t exist in this culture.

I mean, they have juice, it’s just not juice. It is like flavored sugar water. Cranberry juice, grape juice, apple juice all taste really bad here. Like jolly ranchers mixed into water. Don’t even get me started on Orange Juice. They take tang and add real (or at least I hope it is) orange pulp. They market the product as fresh OJ. I just want Simply Natural OJ sooo bad.

The other week, Elliott and I were eating at our local dumpling place and ordered the good old Chinese American (and Panda Express) classic of Orange Chicken. Only we found that what we got was Tang Chicken. The fluorescent Orange sauce has put me off on the stuff for the rest of the trip.

7. They ride escalators but don’t move.

Yes, I know, this happens in America too with fat lazy people, it can be seen as super Amerrrican. But with the amount of people traveling on escalators here, and I mean hundreds at a time, it can become overwhelming. Trying to catch a train or even get into a train station can take way longer than it should as you are on an escalator that you can’t move on.

8. College students act like American 7th graders

This was really the most surprising thing that I have encountered on the entire trip. Having been to Japan, I expected the openness and almost kinkiness that the culture of Japan exhibits. The Japanese love to party and drink and eat and drink some more. They are truly the cooler Asians. Yet, the Chinese have a very puritan lifestyle.

They have spent their entire middle school and high school life focusing on the GaoKao, the national entrance college exam. They spend their entire careers spending their time studying from 8am – 10 pm. School is a prison. The pressure is so great on these kids that they don’t have social lives. NONE.

They take their college careers as a time to talk to girls for the first time, have their first kisses, hold hands, look at porn for the first time, consider masturbating for the first time and cuddle/spoon. It was really a shocking find and almost a huge disappointment of this trip.

Take this all with a grain of salt though, I still freaking love China and have had the time of my life here (up until 7 pm this evening). But with less then a two weeks left here, I know I’m going to miss the shit out of it.

Yeezy Taught Me.

Drew

Chocolate being Chocolate

Its been a while since I updated ya’ll or even put up any pictures, so I thought I’d cliff notes the last few weeks.
With our time in China winding down we have been trying to knock off activities in our area that we wanted to get done while here. I’ve even gone all Morgan Freeman on this bitch and made a Shanghai Bucket List for the last month. We’ll see how much I get done, hopefully most of it.

But so far, since coming back from Beijing, we’ve been to top of the Oriental Peal tower, took an “acid trip” of a ride under the Huangpu river, went to a tea market in a park for a sweet free tasting, watched 3 Bears wins at Bubbas, hung out at a jazz bar talking the future of jazz with 50 year old jazz dudes from the states till like 5 am, found a Japanese dive bar that only serves types of Japanese whiskey called Souju, got a whole mess of pants made for me at a fabric market for hella cheap (including a Wisconsin red pair of gameday pants, and my first pair of corduroys since I was real little (seriously imagine my big ass in corduroys…but I actually think they look good though..i think)), and hit up the usual clubs and bars around town. With much, much more to be done in the coming weeks.
Flans’ parents came this past week too and it was real good to see them, it has probably been almost 7 years. Elliott’s family came in also, including his auntie, cousin and sister. They truly made Shanghai their bitch as I have never seen people buy so many items in a two-day shopping spree than they did. Almost every inch of their hotel bedroom was covered in fake-market swag. It was like Christmas day times 10. They even bought new, matching Luis Vuitton suitcases to take all their gear home with them. That’s what happens when our two Spellman College girls, Charae and Chelsea bargain with the Chinese vendors for you. It was unreal. More power to em though.

Since it’s been a slower couple weeks relatively, and we only have so much time left in China, I thought I’d share with you guys who exactly I’ve been dealing with since being over here. With permission from Elliott at the beginning of the semester, I have chronicled over the course of 3 months all the stereotypical black things that he has done while in China (he was set to record all the New Guy things that I have done, but I think I’m in the clear as he really hasn’t updated his blog for a month now. Thank God).
It’s now every day that these China people see people of African- American decent, and Elliott didn’t let them down. Sure… he may look like Bubbles from the Wire when he doesn’t pick his hair out and he may have had his Auntie bring him a liter of Louisiana Hot Sauce, two big ass bags of Flaming Hot Cheetos, and Jalapeño Krunchers from Chicago for his consumption in the next month here, and he may have eaten all the fried chicken China has to offer, but he has hilarious intentions and he has been the Chocolate to my Peanut Butter on this trip (the nicknames that I proposed early on have actually stuck and no homo).

This weekend should be real cool. We go on a weekend trip with all our friends to Nanjing (about 4 hours away from here) and hit up the hot springs over there. It will be real good to get away for the weekend. I hope everyone has a great Thanksgiving out in the US of A. I’ll really miss it over here, but sure as hell have a lot to be thankful for. Wisco continues to roll and I will for sure be going to the bowl game (wherever it may be..ROSE BOWL??), but if anyone wants to road-trip from Chicago let me know soon thru email. I’m jonesin to tailgate a Wisco football game.

Peace, love, and Thanksgiving turkey grease from China,

倪安德

Fonzworth Bentley called, he wants his umbrella back

This Mo-Fo brought his own hot sauce and Egg McMuffin to a bar 

Too Easy

Blackout at McDonalds eating Fried Chicken


Hide Yo Kids Hide Yo Wife...Cause they raping errbody out here

RIP Louisiana Hot Sauce- Put to rest on the Great Wall of China

Always Classy in Beijing

Wow, what a week it’s been. They really laid on the midterms heavy before our weeklong trip. We even had a midnight deadline the night before we left on a 2 midterms that we got that same day. It was ridiculous, and we all ended up going all the way up to the deadline (and he didn’t even grade it hard, my piece of crap essays both got As). We ended up blowing off a whole bunch of steam that night and the ensuing week. Showing up at the airport at 8am drunk and with everyone having pulled an all-nighter was comical, especially with two clowns Morgan and Rob being almost/ if not blackout.

We spent the next two days in the crappy city of Anyang, which has a population of 5.5 million, but Montclair even has a better nightlife than it. We went to a high school to play a basketball game that I heard was tight, but Elliott and I slept threw it. I blame the all-nighter. The other two days were spent looking at oracle bones, where the original Chinese language was written on, and it was a real snoozer (hate to say it but its true).

Beijing was really cool though. They told us it would be unbelievably cold (I think it snowed like 4 inches when they went last year), but it was sunny and beautiful the whole trip, with few smog too. We did some super touristy stuff: rode rickshaws through the and old school Beijing Hutong, took a boat ride to the Summer Palace, and went to Tiananmen Square and the Forbidden City. These were all really cool spots and we had free bombass lunches and dinners as a group too, so I can’t really complain . The real highlights were the Peking duck dinner, the Donghuamen Night Market, Olympic park and the Great Wall.

The night market was unreal. It was a snack market that sells various edible and exotic snack foods throughout its many hawker stalls. It sold everything from scorpions, millipedes, grasshoppers and beetles, to little squids, little sparrows and starfish. I ended up just getting the scorpions (which actually tasted great), a tarantula spider and other less exotic stuff.

Olympic park wasn’t even scheduled, but after a pri-fix meal at one of Beijing’s best restaurants four of us took a train out to the center to see the engineering feats that were the Birdsnest and the Water Cube. It was really worth the trip. They really gave us a lot of free time to tour the city on the trip, so we made detours like this and a really interesting Frank Gehry architecture exhibit.

The Great Wall was EASILY the best part of the 10 day trip. Going into it I really had expected something totally different. When my pops went there for work he said that it was super touristy, include them having a zoo-like place with bears and a carnival. We got something totally different. It was almost empty throughout and was a truly amazing sight. The hike up it was way more intense than they told us, thank God I didn’t wear my pea-coat that I left on the bus. When we all got to the top, glazed in sweat, there was a local there to meet us selling ice cold beers. BEERS ON THE GREAT WALL?? Of course we indulged. Shotguns on arrival. What a way to do China.

The next few hours were spent on possibly the first (someone may have to record this for historical purposes) Great Wall Crawl. Beers were there for us at almost every tower for only 10 kuai (about $1.50), and we had one at almost every stop. It was an absolutely ridiculous time under the Chinese blue sky.

The nightlife in Beijing was real dope too. Not on Shanghais level of variety, or even proximity, and I’m really glad I go abroad where I do, but really fun nonetheless. We went out every night in one way or another. We went to multiple dance clubs, bars, and even “Strip Clubs”. The apparently don’t have strip clubs here, just go-go like bars where creepy old men watch and drink beer in the dark. The real find was Sanlitun's (pronounced Sanlitour) north bar street, which was tucked away in a dark ally. The street was absolutely bumping at night, just alive with people of all ages (we partied with two mid aged white businessmen in suits the first night. I kinda want to have my Dad be those guys when he’s in Beijing, but just way less creepy to 20 something girls) And with shots for only 10 kuai at every place, it warranted visits on back to back nights to close out the trip.

The last night was our baby faced friend Rob’s 20^th birthday and was just straight-up out of control. Feeling a little pekish from the night before, it took us a while to get going and but after a little bit of hotel pre-gaming we were all more than ready for Sanlitun. We really took advantage of the 10 kuai shots and bar hopped the ally bars until we met up with a group of friends at Shooters . More shots and beer flowed and as the top 40 hip hop played, the night turned into a fantastic haze of Cocaine shots (half Jaeger half Bacardi 151... yeesh). This one French dude who was posted up at the bar next to us started nauseatingly bad mouthing America, not Americans (that wouldn’t have gotten to me, we do suck in a lot of ways), just the country itself. I didn’t say anything and just put it away in the memory bank, sipping on my Tiger beer as Bob was making a hilarious fool of himself on his b-day.

As we walked out the bar I walked up to the badmouthing Frenchy, put my arm around his shoulder and said in my best attempt at a southern accent (PG version) “Listen buddy. America is freaking awesome. You can go put with your French body part up your froggy other body part” (told you I’d keep it clean mom). Then walked away backwards slowly with two middle fingers in the air. Making it well known to him, DON’T MESS WITH AMERICA. Of course, typical for a Frenchman, he had no response at all and hence conceded victory to me. U.S.A. U.S.A.

We got into a cab on the bar street and Bobbo proceeded to puke all over the outside of the cab, with a smile on his face the entire time. Happy 20^th buddy.

The next day was absolutely ridiculous. We had to check out the hotel at 1030am, and went to a lunch spot with our group. Henrik sprinted off the bus as we got there and yaked his brains out, with our teacher John Tai right next to him (all the teachers on our trip were freaking awesome, thank you gifts are surely in order).

When we boarded our sweet plane back to Shanghai, after a few games of Gin Rummy (which im getting mad good at), Lucy, who was still drunk at like 3pm, ended up spewing a few times. Even as we landed in Shanghai Elliott went on and blew chunks into a bag, which of course had a hole in it, emitting his lunch all over himself; and who was sitting next to him? Our teacher John Tai. We really are the classiest bunch of Americans in China.

Also, can I get a an award for having a blog post with the most synonyms for throwing up used in 3 paragraphs?? I’ll look into that…..upchuck. There’s the cherry on top.

What a last few days, What a trip, What a beard I have grown in the meantime.

You speakin the Amerrrican?

Despite having absolutely no energy after the trip, the HSBC World Golf Championship was in Shanghai at Sheshan Golf Course, with most of the best players in the world, it was 70 degrees and sunny, tickets were only 100 kuai (14.50$) for students and it was only 45 minutes away. There was no way I was missing this last Sunday round.

A huge group of 12 got up at 630 in morning, dressed in our goofiest golf attire and made our way through the foggy Chinese morning. This sporting event was easily one of the most unique experiences I have ever been to. Chinese people know next to nothing about golf, so every group was basically empty besides the leaders and Tiger.

Being American, we could be loud as we wanted and the golfers loved us because we were the only people cheering. We posted up on the 6^th hole, a par 3 to start our day and chilled with a bunch of wine, beer, cheese, baguettes and the finest deli meats Shanghai has to offer. We could easily talk to golfers who would talk back to us. Ricky Barnes, tigers caddy Steve Williams, Phil, Ernie, Miguel Angel Jimenez, and Bill Haas all talked to us. Even Camilo Villegas’ caddy called my friend Pete Brian Scalabrene, he was dressed in a Michael Jordan jersey and American flag bandana and is a ginger, which was unbelievably funny. We went nuts for two golfers Hunter Mahan and Paddy Harrington who absolutely loved us. Hunter threw a ball to us on the 6^th hole and on the 17^th we gave Paddy a curtain call after a birdie, while holding a stolen Irish flag from the scoreboard.

The best part of my day happened on the 17^th tee box. Tiger had just birdied 16 and was walking to the tee with a whole mess of swagger. Pete and I were standing right in front of the box and shouted awesome American things at him (God only knows what, we were a few beers deep) and he tipped his cap and said thanks to us. I may have nutted my pants on the spot. When he swung his 6 iron on that same par 3, some stupid Chinese person who was behind me took a picture in Tigers backswing, and when Tiger hit the ball he threw his club and looked right at us, putting the fear of God into the Chinese soul behind me. He stuck the shot 3 feet from the pin. It was unreal.

Francisco Mollinari ended up holding off the new #1 golfer in the world Lee Westwood, by a stoke, but Westwood had a long eagle chance on the 18^th hole that could’ve won it. We were standing on the 18^th fairway in the front row only 25 yards away. It was just a fantastic sun-soaked Sunday afternoon, that was a perfect cap to an amazing week.

Go in Badgers

So its been a few weeks since I last posted something. I guess it’s time to fill ya’ll in.

So I may have missed the greatest weekend that Madison had to offer. I missed what Scott Van Pelt called the “Perfect October Saturday, with temperatures in the 70’s, with people wearing red in every direction, with brats on every grill, and a hopeful feeling in the air.”



A place, which in 2007 he called the best college town in the country, that went absolutely crazy and stormed the field after we beat the #1 team in the nation, the Buckeyes of Ohio State.
I missed Kid Cudi on Sunday, the Bloody Beetroots in Chicago on Monday (which I would have for sure driven down to with Lee and Jan), and a ridiculous DeadMau5 concert on Tuesday.
At first, I had mixed emotions. I became real homesick, Not for the Dirty Jerz, but for the best college town in the country. Then I came to realize that I really had a great weekend too and remembered that I watched the game the only way I knew how, the Sconnie way.

There is this bar Bubbas on the outskirts of Shanghai in Hong Qiao (kinda like the burbs of the city) that serves up some fine Texas BBQ and plays college football games on Sunday afternoons on a tape delay. I had gone there by myself on afternoon to watch the Wisco vs San Jose State game and really dug the place. When I found out that they were playing the Wisco/OSU game I was elated. Elliott and I dressed up in our ridiculous gameday gear (I ended up getting a Wisconsin red sport coat and red bandana to rock), never turned on my blackberry or checked ESPN.com, and headed to Hong Qiao. He wanted the Badgers to win cause if we beat OSU, his Oregon Ducks would be #1 (or so he thought). We pre-gamed the hell out of the game and got to Bubba’s at 3:30 feeling great. Both the Wisconsin and Ohio State Shanghai alumni associations were there and the atmosphere was unreal. From the return of the opening kick off by David Gilreath for a TD the bar was going nuts with OS-WHO? chants and shit-talking. As the game kept going our way and free Jaeger shots were continuously passed around, and $2 pints were flowing, entering half time Elliott was already eating pulled pork and potato salad with his hands... a great sign the night was going in the right direction. When we finally finished off the Buckeyes comeback with a James White TD, the warm Shanghai night was a blur. We ended up at our stomping grounds at Shanghai House of Blues and Jazz (this time with a couple of Wisconsin alumni that tagged along) to see our friend Max perform with Mike Null and the Soulcasters. We danced the night away with some Australians, and almost fought some Germans. Just a normal Sunday night.

We went back to Bubba’s on Friday afternoon at 12 to watch the Oregon/UCLA game that Bubba had taped for us, and this time brought a bigger crew with us to watch the game. The BBQ at this place is unreal, great sides (despite having no Mac and Cheese or Collards), good portions, and real good mustard BBQ sauce or peppery Texas BBQ sauce to choose from. The game was a blowout, so we explored a little and found that they had 2 sets of bags (they call it corn-hole) and played crazy competitive games of bags for almost 3 hours, all while drinking Dead Guy Ale from Rogue Brewery in Oregon. A real solid afternoon at a gem of a bar in Shanghai.


This weekend a typhoon is currently hitting the shores of Shanghai, resulting in torrential downpours and high winds. It surely slowed us down, but we still managed to get out a few nights. We share our dorms with a program from NYU, but they are in a completely other section so we are all real segregated from each other. Someone over there decided to throw a Baijiu (strong ass rubbing alcohol-like liquor) party in the French Concession on Friday and invited our whole program. We were all really pumped to go, as it was $10 USD for an open bar with 3 different DJ’s playing all night. What we forgot to think of was why we hadn’t hung out with the NYU kids all year, as they party was a big bust. The venue was too small, the DJ was weak, and the liquor was so watered down that you had to put in straight up hard work to get any effects. I may have just been straight ignant too, but if I don’t really like many NYU kids when I’m in NYC, what made me think they’d be any better in Shanghai??

Next weekend is going to be real tight though. We’re going on a weeklong trip with our China in Global Context program (they split the CIEE group into two programs) to Beijing and Anyang. I think we’ll be spending Halloween in Beijing; it’s no Halloween in Madison, but should be fun cause we got a real great group of people in our program.

As much as I miss Madison (or even going down to Iowa City to see us take down another top 15 program this weekend), last weekend was a blast here and we really did the game up right. As I was listening to the Scott Van Pelt YouTube clip with him ranting about Madison on this rainy Sunday afternoon, Elliott turns to me and says “I wish it were last Sunday again.” I do to. It really was a one of a kind day in Shanghai, and an experience I will never forget.

Our Himalayan Adventure

“Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming ‘Wow! What a ride’”

-Hunter S. Thompson

So for our adventure into Tibet, the group decided to document out Trip thru a group journal, or Grrrrnllll. The following are passages, life philosophies and quotes from the four of us throught the week and a half…

Day 1

Riding on a total high from the Bears victory against the Packers, we are currently on our way to Tibet. Not without a few pitfalls and miscues along the way though.

Of course, we waited until the very last minute to pay for our trip (mostly due to the fact that 3 of us had to wait for account transfers from America). We were supposed to meet with our travel agent Andy Li at 9:30am, but since we had to pay in cash (an absolutely ridiculous aspect of Chinese culture that I really can’t get by…Just accept a freaking debit or credit card and make life easier) and had to go to 3 different banks to withdrawl the cash from ATMs, we were an hour late to our meeting. Tyler, who had wired his money from the US, wasn’t able to get his money in time, but Andy thankfully cut him a break and is letting him pay him when we get to Lhasa. Hopefully the money goes thru before we get there or he’s royally screwed.

We packed our gear into one backpack each, hopefully enough for 11 days and headed to the Shanghai railway station. It was real crowded; the whole nation gets off for this week long national holiday, but since we’re leaving on Wednesday I think we are missing the real crazy traffic.

The train is awesome. The line was finished in 2006, so its real new. We are staying in a hard sleeper room: 6 bunk beds crammed in a 6’ by 8’ by 10’ space. The vibes in the hard sleeper hallways are way chiller and more laid back (something I totally regret ever writing. I guess I was riding some kind of high) and I’m glad to be here instead of the more comfortable soft sleeper rooms. We’ve already found a few 中国朋友 (Chinese friends) who speak English named Rocky, Numbers, and Popo who instantly gave us some beers to drink. It look’s like its gunna be a fun and entertaining 3000 miles and 3 days on the train.

Day 2

“I’m in a different cabin than the others. I’m roomies with 5 hospital managers in their 40’s-50’s. They are pretty chill snd one asked me to marry his daughter. If things with Kelli don’t pan out I have just met my father-in-law. Speaking of marriage, Kevin and Drew got married to their Chinese wives, leader Tiger and shy Tiger respectively. They will have a happy life together.”

- Tyler

Day 3 “Kisses Lost, Altitude Gained”

“Love, stanky stank, lost first kisses, mistakes between Tigers and Dragons, and lack of sleep eye boogers are all in the thin Chinese air on this fine, fine morning. Last night was magical!! Stereotypes were broken, set up by stupid American shows like Desperate Housewives (Chinese chicks think all Americans cheat on their spouses because of stupid TV) and friends were made. We showed the Chinese Tiger team that the American dragons may breathe fire, but are not always trying to get banged .... Anyways the Sun! It rises out of the East today and luckily Drew and I played our cards right and caught it in the act of waking up and loudly proclaiming to the snow capped mountains ‘Here I am’.”

-Flans

The last few hours on the train were real rough on me. The only few of hours of sleep under my belt (they turned the lights on at 5 freaking AM, just so the Chinamen could see the mountains as soon as possible!!) hit me in the face like a ton of bricks along with the collective 3-day B.O., vinegar rice smell, the unbearable heat, and the fact that one of our Chinese bunkmates constantly farted for 2 hours straight. I don’t even think if it was the altitude that got to me ( we were around 15,000 ft above sea level) because I stayed really hydrated the whole way. Nonetheless, I was white as a ghost, so I put some BRUCEEEE on my ipod and forced myself to nap the 3 hrs until we got to Lhasa.

The cool Tibetan air felt so good when we got off the train and was exactly what I needed, I was ready to take on the week. We met with our guide Linda and our Driver Lhosa, who took us to a sweet, kinda touristy hotel in Old Lhasa. We hit up a Tibetan Steak House for dinner. We dined on all kinds of different Yak products: Steak, vermicelli noodles, Yak momos (heavy dumplings), and Yak Butter Tea. They also had all kinds of Indian food, something we were all missing in Shanghai. Lhasa is real interesting, a little touristy, but cool in its own way. The women are way more beautiful than the Han women in Shanghai. The city shuts down at night it seems, and there is a heavy military presence by the Chinese government. They really don’t want any Shenanigans going down in the region and it really shows. Tomorrow should be fun at the monasteries in town. Time to get acclimated to the altitude.

Day 4 WWRGD: What would Richard Gere do?? (11,450 ft above sea level)

The whole day we toured the great city of Lhasa. Potala Palace, Jokhang Temple and the Barkhor were all knocked off in this busy, but truly beautiful day.

“Sitting in a grungy teahouse in Lhasa. Sipping on sweet yak butter tea, the only whiteboys in the damn place and proud of it. All while weirdly fitting in…Let’s play cards.”

-Flans

Day 5

Remember how I said that it was a real nice change of pace to eat Indian food? I completely take that back. A goddamn plate of Chicken Tandoori, took away 4 hours of my sleep while I was on the toilet and really put a damper on my entire day. No lie it was the single worst night I have ever had. I was leaking like the BP oil spill, it couldn’t be stopped (If you thought I’d go more than 2 weeks without mentioning poop, you’re reading the wrong blog). When it came time for breakfast, 2 pills of erythromycin and Immodium, I had no fluid left in my body, and proceeded to throw up because of my empty stomach. This is all before our 12 hour car journey to Shigatse, all with remain of rotten Chicken Tandoori bubbling in my stomach. FML

Day 6 (16,500 ft)

Another long ass car ride through the absolutely amazing Tibetan landscape. Words cannot describe everything we saw along this car ride. A stunning array of mountains.

By the time we got to the final checkpoint (the greedy-ass Chinese government puts checkpoints throughout this trip so they can get as much money as they can from tourists) it was 10 at night and the freaking travel agency forgot one of our permits. We were 20 km away from our monetary hotel at Everest Basecamp. The trip to Everest was in doubt and we couldn’t really appreciate the most awe inspiring starry night I’ve ever seen, it was a total turd in the punchbowl scenario. The 15 km trip back to the nearest town was deafly silent. It was like when a dad yells at his kids in the beginning of the car ride and not one single person says a peep the entire way back…..super awkward.

Day 7 (16,000ft- 18,500 ft)

The Yak hotel where we stayed was exactly the kind of dive that I wanted to stay in during the entire trip (the Chinese government requires foreigners to stay in nice hotels in the main cities). No heat, one main room with a fireplace, a hole in the ground for a crapper, good company, a little bit of Gin Rummy, and some Lhasa Beer made for a great night to forget our permit problems.

When we woke up Henrik and I ventured into a nearby field sat by a stream for about an hour, soaking in the partially blocked view of the great Everest, as we didn’t know if that’s as close as we’d get. When we got back the permit problem was resolved and we were off to Mt. Qomolangma.

Words can’t describe it so I’ll let pictures to the talking.

Day 8-9 “The sun never sets on awesome”

“On our way back from Shigatse, headed towards Lhasa. Yesterday we visited EVEREST. It was unbelievable. I feel like I’m still coming down from the experience. I didn’t expect to be so drawn in by the mountain. Everything seems so insignificant while in the shadow of Everest; just dominating my thoughts. Drew and I walked up with Linda gasping for air while Kevin and T-m0ney booked it ahead of us…Maybe I should quit smoking? (We hiked 8 km from Rongbu Monestary to base camp…tough as shit, but soooooo worth it in the end)

When we reached base camp I was consumed. I thought of the 1000’s of people that had made the hike/ pilgrimage before us with hopes of taming the beast. The thoughts they had as they made the same hike as us, the thoughts they had as they looked towards the summit as we did. It’s now wonder the native Tibetans referred to it as the throne of god.”

-Henrick

Day 9-11

Back on the train. Not as much fun this time without Popo. I’ve killed the two books I brought. I finally freaking finished Bill Simmons’ ginormous Book of Basketball and breezed through Anthony Bourdain’s Medium Raw. Kinda bored out of my mind. And have had three bloody noses in the last day from all the dry air (and some nose picking). No internet on my Blackberry. Starting to lose my shit. AHHHHH

“Dear Diary,

I can’t stop picking my nose. I think I have a problem. What ever shall I do? Thanks for listening, you’re #1.”

-Flans

Day 12

Finally back in Shanghai. It’s starting to really fell like home. Had an amazing American breakfast and lunch with the same great company we went on the trip with. Already started drinking, should be a good chill night. Much needed.

Day 13

Somehow last night I ended up at a new Jazz club (Club JZ) until 430am, by myself. No idea how that one happed or how I got home with the amount of Chinese I currently speak. I kinda gotta get my shit together since I have a test on Monday. Or stop going to the Belgian Beer bar Kaiba to pregame the night with 14% alcohol beers.

This afternoon was the perfect lazy Sunday. Brunch at 2:30 in the afternoon for a great pancake special at a gem of a place. Followed by a lunch 5 minutes after at another find…a classy American fast food joint. You can’t pass up chocolate and peanut butter (also Elliott and my new nicknames) milkshakes and Chicago style hotdogs. Even if you just ate breakfast. Follow that up with a surreal art gallery tour down the block , along with the fact that we are still comfortably in shorts and t-shirts, and you have an amazing day.

Popo summed up the past weeks adventures with the few English words she wrote down in our Grrnnlllll. “Hope tomorrow will be better. And happy life. Easy life……People come and people go, but they live in my memory forever.” Oh the glory of it all….Life sure is good.

"We're not in Milwaukee Anymore"

Currently, Elliott and I are being those guys at a café on our laptops, blogging the Sunday away, but I think we may have found what I think the only bagel place in Shanghai. Of course, owned and operated by a dude from Jersey. I don’t think ex-pats from the tri-state area can get over a hangover without a bagel with schmear or a sausage egg and cheese on an everything, even in China. I’m getting crazy and going for the surf and turf for the morning splitting a lox and cream cheese and a chorizo scramble with my friend Henrik. A gamble that I think might pay off.

This week was kind of weird one, but fun nonetheless. We had a day off on Wednesday for the Mid-Autumn festival, a time in China to eat moon cakes, but I think that’s it. Kevin has since become a VIP at the Belgian beer bar Kaiba, only costing him about $50 USD for the semester, so we went to their 2 ^nd birthday party on Tuesday night. Our waitress from the last time Mia, being the true angel that she is, got us all in as VIPs and really just hooked it up for us all night. It was an all you can drink Veddette Extra White and Duvell courtyard party, a Labor Day BBQ at its finest. The rest of the night is kind of a haze, but we ended up back at the Jazz and Blues bar and danced the night away to Mike Null and the Soulcasters…and I’ll leave it at that.

The rest of the week until Friday kind of sucked, as my roommate ended up getting me sick. Actually, at least 10 kids in the group have been sick this week so, I can’t totally blame him. You gotta love living in dorm style rooms again. I stayed in on Thursday and Friday, which was real lame, but we’re going to Tibet on Wednesday so I was not trying to be unhealthy for that trip.

Saturday morning I felt a lot better and we took a daytrip to Suzhou, a city of about 6 million people that’s an hour and a half away from Shanghai. Our program advertised it to us as “the Venice of China”, so group morale was pretty high going into the city. Little did we know that it was more like the Milwaukee of China. Not that I have anything against the great city of Milwaukee, I really dig it’s vibes, but Suzhou was a huge disappointment. It was Shanghai’s ugly step-sister, kind of like what Milwaukee is to beautiful Chicago. Sorry I’m not sorry. The trip took us to 3 places in the city: a silk factory, a boat cruise, and a garden.

The factory was a huge waste of time, just an uninteresting tourist trap. Elliott and I were able to get a few pairs of silk boxers/shorts (not really sure if I know what they are yet) on clearance, which we then wore for the rest of the day. Same went for the boat cruise, as they packed us onto a tiny boat and road around for an hour or two not really seeing all that much. Not even close to as much fun as the booze cruise we went on in Milwaukee last spring (Milwaukee still has it’s redeeming qualities). The park was really beautiful, tucked away as a sleepy getaway in a bustling city. It was just a shame that it was packed in with hundreds of tourists, including our fifty-person group. Had I been the only person there I think I would have really gotten a chance to truly appreciate it, but it was just kind of hard with so many people around.

The disappointment of this day trip resulted in a mass desire to have a crazy night, and it really didn’t disappoint. It started off at an all you can eat AND DRINK sushi spot. I kid you not, if we were in the states, the group of seven of us went thru about $2000 worth of sushi, sake, plum wine and beer. That’s not even counting the 15 other guys who were on the floor above us doing the exact same thing. This tiny sushi spot had no idea what had hit em. Two and a half hours of non-stop eating and sake for college students is never a good thing for a restaurant.

Guys from the upstairs were going to the bathroom so frequently that we had to turn it into a drinking game. In order to catch up to them, as they were there a half hour before us, we had a draft of the guys from upstairs for who would go to the bathroom the most. When your guy makes it past the table, you have to drink a craft of sake. Confusing, I know, but at the time it made a lot of sense and since I franchise so much in Madden and NBA 2k10, I can never turn down a draft. This easily caught us up and put us on track for a great night.

When we left the restaurant, at about 11ish, it was like a bomb went of across the street from the sake place. Everyone had their big arse bottles of beer, that the restaurant let us take out, probably a mistake on their part. Right when we got across the street, in about a span of 15 seconds Flans threw up, someone dropped their beer, which exploded on the ground and then our friend Colin threw up. Some people just can’t handle all you can eat sushi. The night continued at a club in the nice part of town Xaintiandi, called G+, where we owned the dance floor. Shenanigans ensued, but Elliott covers the night in more detail at his blog www.gyratingeastward.blogspot.com , so ya’ll should check it out I think he'll have it up soon. It was a real solid night out after our crappy day in China’s Milwaukee.

We go to Tibet and Mount Everest this upcoming Wednesday for an 11 day train adventure. We still haven’t paid in full, gotten tickets or really have a set itinerary from our travel agent yet, but we’re just going with the flow. Flans came up with an idea to start a Grournal (Group Journal) to document our daily feelings and sights in Tibet, so I’ll try to get that posted on the blog when I can. It should be one hell of a trip at 18,000 feet above sea level so ill take as many pictures as I can while we’re there. Hopefully altitude sickness doesn’t incapacitate me either, but that’s still to be seen. Great Badgers win against Austin Peay, I hope the first gameday at the house was a blast, and I praying Jay Cutler continues his solid play against the Pack on Tuesday morning (Monday night in the US).

Peace from Shanghai,

Drew

Who Poops in a Gazebo????

This week has gone by in a flash. School was actually pretty intense with the tutoring and all the language homework. We had a fieldtrip for my globalization class to the birthplace of communism in China, which was pretty tight, but the weekend couldn’t have come soon enough.

The Boat with Me and Flans holding down the fort on the runway

Friday night was easily one of the classiest nights out I have ever had. Yes, even beating out winter pea-coat nights to the Capitol bars in Madison. CIEE took our whole study abroad group to a Huangpu river cruise. This river separates the Bund from the Pudong district and easily has the most amazing views of the city on either side. It really is about time that I bought a camera because I don’t really think I will ever be able to experience those views again…I was kinda kicking myself for not having one. The pictures other people took of us are both stunning and really hilarious, so ill put those up here when they circulate facebook. Obviously, we wanted to do this night up in style, so we all wore our classiest outfits and turned the riverboat cruise into a tasteful booze cruise (is there such a thing?). Everyone had the most amazing time on the boat, who doesn’t like mingling with random people with the views we had. After that the most of the big group separated to get dinner and go clubbing, but a small few of us decided that since we were looking sooooo good that we might as well ball out a little bit.

James and the Spellman Crew

Me Flans and Sarah with the Bund

We walked down the Bund to the Armani building in Bund #3 (there’s 29 in all) and went to the rooftop bar called New Heights. From there we got real classy and some bought a bottle of scotch and the rest sipped on martinis and smoked Cubans. It was expensive, but really not absolutely ridiculous with the view that we had from this rooftop. It was still only 12:30 by the time we were wrapping up, so we ended up rolling to the House of Jazz and Blues a couple of blocks away and saw Mike Null & The Soulcasters, a blues band from Boston. We hung out with the band after their set too, which was real chill.

When we came back to the dorms, we all still had some energy left so we took a bottle of wine and went to the riverside gardens behind our dorm. We tried to hang out and relax in the real cool gazebo in the park, but after 2 min the whole place started to really smell. Little did we know our friend Morgan (who everyday dresses like the Fonz, but is one of the most interesting persons I’ve ever met) had been sitting in a big pile of human shit the entire time. Which is totally nasty, but at the same time ridiculously funny (especially after seeing him wash said poopy pants in stagnant Chinese river water). Begging the question of the night, who would ever poop in a gazebo???

Saturday was just as chill, with a small group of a few guys and girls going to a Belgian beer bar for almost all afternoon. We had to have tried at least 30 different beers from all over the world while eating mounds of real good gouda cheese. You can take the kid outta Wisconsin, but you can’t take Wisconsin outta the kid. The night eventually took us to a few more pubs, ultimately ending in watching the sun come up on the banks of the river as we drank bottles of the finest cheap wine that China has to offer. All in all, a much needed weekend after the demanding work week.

Literally as I am finishing up this post in the warm late afternoon on Sunday on the edge of the river, and I am seriously not even kidding, some very large homeless woman just got completely naked and squatted in the bushes under a set of palm trees on the other side of the river and dropped a deuce. I think my prior of question of who would poop in a gazebo just got answered. Only in China.